#94 - Revisit the places that made you who you are

When I added this to my bucket list, a lot of people read this as an attempt to hold on to my past.  To some extent I guess it is.  And only now, at age 33, am I able to admit that I want to hold on to all of my memories - the good, the bad, and the ugly.  I like knowing that I'm developing peace with my past because that is the ultimate Do-Over Life Lesson for me - inner peace.  I was dealt a difficult hand early in my life and to this day it still affects me, so to be able to want to draw meaning from the earliest of memories is quite an accomplishment for me.  I believe by embracing my past, it will open up doors for me in the future.  So that's what this Do-Over Life Lesson is really about, not just holding on to the past, but preparing the way for my future.  

I recently had the opportunity to revisit Bainbridge Island, Washington - my absolute favorite place in the world.  For a point of reference, I lived on Bainbridge Island from 2006-2008 and I would have been 26 when I arrived and left just before my 28th birthday.  It was a blip in my adult life really, where I lived in 4 different states and too many different cities to count, but Bainbridge Island has by far been the most influential place I've live thus far in my life. 

View from Manitou Beach Drive (where I used to live)

I made the decision to move to Bainbridge Island after ending my marriage.  It was a difficult decision, one that I made hastily and based entirely on emotions, but it is a decision that I will never take back.  It was one of the few times in my life that I listened to what my gut was telling me to do.  I surrendered to the Universe and jumped from the ledge arms outstretched, trusting that I would be taken care of.  And man, did the Universe provide the perfect place for me to recover my broken self. 

I love everything about Bainbridge Island - the idyllic location in the Pacific Northwest, the rain, the fog, the rocky beaches full of sand dollars and purple starfish scrambling to beat the low tides, the isolation the island offers coupled with the close proximity to the hustle and bustle of Seattle.  What I love most about Bainbridge Island is that it is the only place that I have lived where I feel like myself.  I don't have to pretend to be anything that I am not and yet the sky is the limit on who I can become.  After ending such a restricting relationship in my life, it was nice to have so many possibilities. 

Riding the ferry into downtown Seattle was both romantic and cumbersome. 
Ferry schedules didn't always match up with my social engagements. 

Everything fell into place for me while living there.  I found a small room for rent on the Island, found a job on my 2nd day there (yes I moved 2 states away without first securing a job - it was part of that leap of faith thing) and I threw myself into recovery mode, not really knowing what that entailed. 





I wrote every single day.  Sometimes all day.  I painted on the weekends and curled up with a good book on the couch listening to the rain drizzling down overhead.  If there was something I wanted to explore, I did it without hesitation.  If I felt like staying in, I did so without guilt.  If I missed the last ferry to the island after a night out with friends, I wandered the pier and watched the sunrise from Pike's Place Market until the morning ferries started running again.  If I needed to sleep 18 hours I would, sometimes without taking off my coat or boots - falling face first into my bed. 



Mt. Rainier view from Bainbridge Island



For me, Bainbridge Island was about doing what I wanted and in doing so I found what I needed. 

Having the opportunity to revisit this Island, my Island, 6 years after leaving, I was quickly reminded of how important this place is to me.  And how important it is for me to go back.  It's time.  

-Mand'e